initiation

as a child

I was powerfully open and innocent,

taking in the world,

being shamelessly and fiercely myself.

and then

I was initiated into the illusion

of limitation.

initiated into the illusion

that I am not allowed to be myself.

when was the first time you felt you had to hide?

in this transition,

this initiation into humanhood,

without the proper tools,

the heart naturally closes off

to protect itself

in attempts to stay pure in the midst of

a confusingly toxic environment.

so

I walked this world

unknowingly

with a closed heart,

ignorantly content with numbness

until my soul chose to

step onto a different path.

you know the one…

the one that’s equally as challenging as it is joyful,

the one where once you start walking,

there’s no turning back.

no turning back from awareness to ignorance.

and thank GOD

because even though